#MusicMonday

Because this post is at the end of the month (due to the fact that I have not been updating my blog), this month's #MusicMonday will be lopped in with February's #MusicMonday.

So, here are my top 3 songs from this week.

1. "I'm Gonna Show You Crazy" Bebe Rexha

I'm not going to lie... This song speaks to me on many different levels. If you think I'm just crazy, then you've got a whole world coming to you. No shame whatsoever. Ask any one of my close friends about the revenge I have wished to do to people. Luckily, my self-control is greater than my craziness, so no need to worry about it, but I still LOVE this song.

Fun fact: I proceeded to tell a guy about how I relate to this song and he still continued talking to me. Either he thought I was kidding or I am attractive enough to be as crazy as I am. Either way, I suck at flirting.

2. "Bitch, I'm Madonna" Madonna

#Same

3. "Friends" Brooklynn

Check out the song here!!! Sorry I couldn't find a video, but the song is still boss.

In retrospect, I'm not super crazy... But................................................................. Yeah, whatever. We all have our moments. Mine happen to be more frequent than mosts.

As per ushe, to check out all 15 of this week's songs, click here to hear all of the recently compiled songs, check out my Spotify playlist!

To Dream Another Dream

Heyyooo kiddos,

I'm back (wow it's been 4 days instead of like 4 weeks, teehee)!

But I'm back with another dream update. I said I would tell y'all about all of my reoccurring dreams and here is one... Well. This dream was a 2-fer because there were two distinct parts that bled into one. The first half is a new half and I have no idea why it blended into the reoccurring part.

Pt 1.

I'm hiding from my friends because I just can't trust them. I have an operations base set up in my apartment and I am trying to hide from their constant bombardments. I'm not actually under attack, like physically, but emotionally/mentally/psychologically. And those are being solidified, like when an "attack" comes, it's memories from a friend that hurt me, but they arrive in the form of a grenade. So, yeah, when it explodes, the memory plays. So a prominent memory played back in my head but in tenfold. I can elaborate on that memory on another day. For now, we will call it BFM1 (Bad Friend Memory 1). So as I'm watching this memory, there's another friend in my base who turns out not to be my friend at all. She's been secretly relaying all of my plans and attacks to our mutual friend who is attacking me. When I find out that there's a spy in my base, I'm going through window where I see a random friend.

Pt 2.

So then this transitions to my reoccurring dream. The earliest moment I remember starts off very dark and macabre. I'm with a couple of my friends and we see this hooligan outside of my house. We head outside to confront him but then he grabs one of my guy friends and slashes his body in half. We are horrified (duh) and we try to run back inside but he shoots my three other guy friends. Me and one of my girl friends make it back inside. We have no idea where the other one is. One of my guy friends isn't dead, so the guy cuts his head off. It's bloody everywhere because he is dismembered our already dead friends. We are hiding behind the door while also looking outside (because there's this panel where we can see outside but out can't see in) and we see the guy come up to us with a gun and he points it at the door. He's on the phone and he's trying to position his gun blindly. He takes a first shot and we scream and scramble. He takes a second blind shot and hits my friend's foot and now she's on the ground trying to crawl. I'm holding on to her and I am dragging her to our safe zone. We run into our other friend who was missing and she's on the phone telling the person where we are in the house. So I get upset because I think she's talking to the guy who was outside. So then I black out. Time has passed (I have no idea what happened in that time) and my father and I are running out of jail into the arms of my mother/his wife.

What had happened was that the guy wanted to get revenge on my father because he thought that my dad indirectly killed his family when he opened his casino. We were held in jail for protective custody until the police can find the man, which they did. We learned that it wasn't my father's fault because it wasn't even his casino because my dad is a doctor who doesn't gamble. He just got the names confused because of dyslexia or short term memory and information overload. Or something. When I'm done hugging my mother, I see my friend who was on the phone. She came to see me. But I slap her because I think it's her fault that the guy shot our other friend, who ended up dying. But then she was telling me about how she called the police and was giving them where we are as a safety precaution.





And then I wake up.

Weird, weird dream. I know what the first part means, but not the second part...

It's Been A While

Since I've posted, obviously.

And a lot of other things, like being true to myself. I'm not going to lie, I found today and right now to be a perfect time to give you a short update of my life because

1) I'm sick
2) I just finished my french dictation
3) I have to go to office hours in a few
4) I just popped a Benadryl and I feel it coursing through my veins
5) I'm just so damn serene while drinking this tea (mint green tea, orange, honey)
6) I have TWO quizzes today that I am just not prepared for. Yes, I studied, but I barely even remember waking up today. All I remember are the faint clacking noises from my roommate's booties walking into the room and me just magically being awake.

I had a weird weird dream.

If you have ANY idea what it means, please, tell me.

So there's this underaged girl who looks like me but is not actually me (or is she? I don't know to be honest) and she is carrying on a relationship with this really attractive older man. All the while, she's lying to him about her age. But really, she's trying to throw him in jail and get a lot of dirt on him as a vendetta mission. So after a while, aka sex, she jumps out of bed and she tells him everything. She has no remorse whatsoever. Then she pulls out a gun on the older man and shoots him in the leg. Then I magically come out of nowhere and I shoot the underaged girl. We are staring at each other because obviously we look identical but we aren't really the same person because I am not jailbait. So then I help the older man to my car and we drive to the supermarket which actually has a hospital in it. Then, in the market, we are being chased by underaged me who survived the spray of bullets. So we decide to hide with my sister and her friend, and all I can hear are the clacking noises of my roommate's boots.

Like this was a weird dream and it was extremely vivid.

Luckily, it was not a recurring dream. I've had about 2, maybe 3, dreams that always happen from time to time and they kind of scare me, to be honest. Currently, they're hazy, but when it happens again, I will definitely write about so that way I can have a concrete version of it.

But, I am off to office hours unfortunately. I didn't really get to talk about what I wanted to get off my chest, but this is good enough. I feel a little bit better and I don't know if it's because of this or because I haven't coughed in the past 5 minutes (knock on wood) and I can finally breathe through BOTH nostrils!

Ugh.