Music Monday

Well, lookie here... I'm trying to think of the most effective way to lay out my Music Mondays. I can't redirect you to my Spotify playlists anymore, but that doesn't mean Music Mondays are over! I think for now I'll just do the same format for my Monday posts (top 3 songs), but on the Main Tab, I'll just keep on adding to make a larger list of all of the songs.

So without further ado...

1. "All My Love (ft Ariana Grande & Machel Montano) [Remix]" Major Lazer.

Oh. My. God. As much as I do not particularly enjoy Ariana, THIS SONG IS SO GOOD. I cannot sit still whenever I play it. It's crack.

2. "Cool for the Summer" Demi Lovato

DON'T BE SCARED CUZ I'M YOUR BODY TYYYYYYYYPPPPPEEEEEE 

3. "Mercy" Muse

This whole album is just soooooooo good. Plus this song is 100 when you're driving with the windows down. *so badass.*

MIA Update

As I'm sitting at my internship, freaking out on some caffeine, I thought to myself "WOAH I STILL HAVE A BLOG." I have semi-valid reasons for not updating it, I really do.

• Music Monday: So I started Apple Music and it's wonderful but I'm *so lazy* that I haven't really been keeping track of what I've been listening to except my Of Monsters and Men, Mumford and Sons, AWOLNation, and Years & Years radio. 

• Paleo Kitchen: I swear I'm still paleo. I just haven't made anything pretty yet. But I made three awesome recipes: Coconut Craisin cookies and Goat Cheese Avocado Pasta Sauce and Dip. I'll make them really pretty and take pictures and tell you how I made them and all will be right with the world.

• Life: So I started NCIS on Netflix and I'm sure you'd love to hear ALL ABOUT IT, right? No. I swear all I do is sit on my couch and watch Netflix and make food. I would love to tell you about the packing I've done, the self-actualization I've been doing, and the studying for my LSAT, but I haven't started those. 

But then I realized, I created this blog for me and to express myself and to be me. And I've been neglecting that. So, let's try a Looking Forward for the week...

• Working Out! I haven't done physical activity in like a week. I blame my period but also that's a lame excuse for me since I only have slight cramps and muscle aches which I know can be alleviated with some exercise if I ever feel like I want to get up and do it.

• Noveling: The art of writing a novel. So I have commitment issues. I can never commit and finish a story I start. So, I decided to start smaller and write a short story. I'm on chapter 3/7. I can do this. Thanks, Shia.

• Packing: I am leaving home IN A WEEK (to go to the beach.) I have not yet packed. I am getting rid of all clothes that I have not worn in a year. This will be painful. I found a skirt I had from the NINTH GRADE. Yellow plaid double buckle drop waist pleated skirt, straight out of the "How To Be Emo 101 In High School" guide book.

• Discipline: I will work out and I will train myself to do it everyday.

• LSAT: At least 30 minutes a day. I can do this, right? My test is October 3rd... Actually, send help. I can't do this.

• Music Monday: I'm going to find cool tunes. It won't be via Spotify anymore since I've switched to Apple Music, but if I make the switch back to Spotify,  I'll definitely let you know!

• Writing: I AM AN AWESOME WRITER. I'm going to start hyperlinking to some of the articles I've written. They're about Beauty but still. They're awesome. 

• Me: There is nothing wrong with watching Netflix.

• Friends: I made so many plans to hang out with people this week. I'm laughing because I hate making plans to hang out with people. I'll commit to them and be friendly and stuff. 

Like I said though, I have commitment issues, so we'll see, we'll see.

My First (College) Love

Being in love SUCKS. Unrequited loved SUCKS MORE. And being thrown off of a cliff would probably SUCK THE MOST. So, let's start this post with some optimism: At least I have never been thrown off a cliff before :).

I try to do the "tough girl" act as if I don't have feelings. Some people believe it until they get to know me and they know how much of a softy I really am. I love puppies, babies, my puppy, my future babies, wine, cooking, and making stuff. This is in addition to my love of makeup, beauty, and clothes.

I swear I wasn't always tough. Some assholes and ex-friends had to go and break my heart. So then, I get upset and I fix myself back together with the intent of not letting anybody break my heart again. Guess what happens? Yeah, yeah, yeah, please I'll take the tissue you're about to offer me *sniffle sniffle.*

So I get to college and I think "Not this time, I swear."

Logically, it happens.

I met this guy... thinking about our history makes me want to cry and throw my laptop at his head. We never dated, which is probably what makes things worse, but I considered him one of my best friends. I'm wary on posting this because I'd probably rip my heart out if he saw this, but I also just need to talk about it because I'm about to go "let me watch horror movies, anti love movies, eat all the food in the world, and cry about boys" mode and for the love of all the body progress I've been making (and the fact that this would not be healthy for anybody I would manage to rope in,) I decided to write about it.

I really want to write about every single memory I can remember, but I think I've tortured myself enough by replaying them countless times.

I don't know, guys, he was kinda perfect for me, or at least I thought so. We had comfortable silences, I loved just watching him, he was there when I needed him, he was (disturbingly) funny (in his own ways,) and he was just a good person. And when we hugged, OH MY GOD, it was as satisfying as placing the missing puzzle piece in an almost finished masterpiece. Such a lame analogy, but that's how I felt.

Then, something happened. I don't know what. I have my guesses and theories, but I just don't know. We stopped being friends. To me, it felt extremely abrupt, as if somebody (him) just snapped our connection, not even in half, but just on his side, leaving me with all these painful memories. And do you know what's funny? The minute I felt our friendship die, his twitter profile picture (it was us, the cutest picture of us EVER) was changed to one of just himself. LAME.

I should show you the Twitter picture because it was really the cutest picture ever (he even said it was one of his favorites AND HE HAD IT SAVED ON HIS DESKTOP)... But for the sake of his privacy, let's not.

So, I really don't know what went wrong. Was it me? Was it him? Was it an outside force? I know I could just ask him but let's be real about how the convo will go.

Me: "Hey... So... Why did we stop being friends?"
Him: "I was busy. We should catch up."
Me: "Awesome, okay."

And then we catch up and that's the extent of our conversation. I mean, I could always be like "I LOVED YOU WHAT HAPPENED!" But in what world has that ever turned out okay for anybody?

Yeah, thought so.

I can assure you... After him, nobody has entered my heart as he did. I keep guys away at arm's length, like back at my middle school Catholic school dances. I barely even give friends a chance. I'm all messed up but I made a promise to myself to be more open this upcoming school year, so we will see how that goes.

Paleo Kitchen: Trail Mix

I don't know why I felt the need to make a post on this, but I really did feel obliged to do so. When I created this, I could have sworn I discovered fire (or somebody's mixtape hahaha.) Like, who knew trail mix was so easy to make? NOT I. Actually, I was never a big fan of trail mix anyways soooooo...

I was starving at my friend's house and she had trail mix and I was like "I CAN ONLY EAT THE CASHEWS AND RAISINS." And she was like "Why don't you make your own?" And I was like ":O."

So I did. I made some trail mix and I put it in a bowl so that I can snack on it during the work day! I'll give you a place to begin, but it's so much fun to experiment!

Trail Mix

Ingredients

• 1 ounce cashews (~16 pieces)
• 2 ounces almonds (~32 pieces)
• 1 ounce organic unsweetened coconut flakes
• 1/2 ounce 100% cacao chips

Instructions

• Mix them together
• Eat over the course of a day
• :D

Like, this looks goooooooodddd. Next time, I'm going to add some raisins or dried cranberries. Maybe some other dried fruits. It needs some sugar to pick me up. But I make this for work 1-2 times a week and I'll eat a little every 30 minutes or so to keep me not hungry :).

Lost Connections: Mystery Man

I brought along my laptop to vacation because I was determined that I was going to keep you guys updated about my time in Europe.

Then I got there and yeah, well, no. It's not that I didn't want to, but my day to day was not nearly as exciting as I thought it would be.

Unfortunately I did not meet an international popstar in Italy or my doppelgänger. Plus, nobody gave me a hunkin' huge piece of cheese.

Nor did I want to constantly complain about my parents and talk about the history I do not know about the monuments we visited, so I decided to scrap the project.

But then I met a guy... I'm laughing because if you personally know me, my greatest/weirdest/most WTF stories usually involve one of two elements: boys or alcohol. Some stories involve both and it is just too much to handle, for reals.

So I met a guy. HE WAS PERFECT (for a short term fling while on vacation.) He said he graduated from Columbia University in NYC on a basketball scholarship. Then he said he was going to Columbia Law to study international and maritime law. Normally, I don't usually question what people tell me unless they have a reason to lie. I really don't think I'm a person who looks like I need to be impressed by big names: heck, people still think I'm in high school! And it's not like where I told him where I go to school, so it's not like he needed to up me. I guess you can be whoever you want to be on vacation, but if you're going to be somebody else, you should do some research.

First rule of tall tales: make sure it can't be easily falsified. Easy google search of his name, Columbia, basketball roster turned up nothing. Like, absolutely nothing. I don't normally stalk guys on Google unless I want something more than a one week fling, but his story just wasn't adding up. I go to a school that incites some serious reactions from people. I don't know why, it just does. So when I eventually told him where I went, he was like "Oh. Where's that? Oh. Okay......?"

Yeah, no, huge red flag right there.

For the sake of his attractiveness, the fact that (some) intellectual things actually came out of his mouth, and his hips moving in a godly way, I ignored this first red flag and continued pursuing him. Nothing happened between us (because I'm lame and do a thing where I avidly avoid people.) But then after our second encounter and another red flag (the fact that he said he studied political science but didn't know Obama was in his second term... dude) I made my friends investigate. When they turned up nothing, I became rly 'spicious.

Part of me was like "HE SKETCHY HE A SERIAL KILLER HE SHADY SHIT" but the other part of me was like "This guy who looks extremely attractive with a body of 8/10 and amazing dance moves is talking to ME." So I pushed things away because a hot guy was talking to me.

You know, I should really work on my self-confidence. What if he preys on girls who think less of themselves like me and then kills them? If I had died, I would have wanted Keke Palmer or Gabrielle Union to play me in the Lifetime movie.

Even with all these red flags, I was still kinda infatuated by him. At the moment, I was not 100% sure he was lying. It wasn't until I did my own research (because my friends didn't know what he looked him) that I was like "THAT DIRTY LIAR." Yet, still, he continues to be on my mind, as made evident by the fact that I am writing a blog entry about him.

So, if you know this man, please let me know. I have a few words I'd like to tell him.

Paleo Kitchen: Fried Cauliflower Rice

This shit ain't pretty, but it's yummy, so that's truly all that matters in this case.

I have HATED cauliflower up until I went paleo. Now, I tolerate it, but I can only do so if it is prepared well. So, I decided to make some fried rice with it. It was a little bit soft, but I'll work on that. If you decide to make this and you have tips, PLEASE LET ME KNOW. Kk, thanks.

Cauliflower Fried Rice 

Ingredients (for 3-4 people)

• 6 ounces of organic mixed veggies (mine have corn, peas, beans, carrots, but you can usually whatever you want. My mother likes it with lima beans and broccoli. Low-key, I'd rather starve than eat those. YUCK.)
• 1 cup uncooked cauliflower rice (made by shredding a cauliflower)
• 1 chicken breast, cooked, cut into small cubes
• 1 chicken sausage link, cooked, cut into small pieces
• 4 cloves minced garlic
• 1 ounce onions
• Sea Salt
• 1-2 tbsp tamari sauce
• 2 eggs
• 2 tbsp olive oil 

Instructions 

• Heat up 1 tbsp of olive oil in a wok on medium heat
• Add the garlic and the onions and let cook for 3-4 minutes
• Add the mixed veggies and let cook for 3 minutes.
• Then add the chicken breast and sausage. 
• Sprinkle some salt.
• Push to one side of the wok and scramble your eggs on the other side. You want your eggs to be cooked and then cut into smaller pieces before mixing it with your stir fry.
• Add a tablespoon of the tamari sauce and then remove the stir fry mixture and place on a plate or in a bowl.
• Heat up another tbsp of olive oil before adding the cauliflower rice. Add some salt. Cook for 4-5 minutes.
• On high heat, add a tbsp of tamari sauce and mix until the rice is a light brown.
• Add the stir fry and mix until it looks even.
• Cook over high heat for another minute or two, making sure to keep on mixing it every now and then.

Look. Yum. It's comfort food,  but it's made out of organic food and cauliflower.

:D

Paleo Kitchen: Avocado Egg Basket

Ask anybody... I am NOT partial to avocados. I usually skip the guac unless it is just filled with parsley, cilantro, tomatillos, and onions. Also, I need like 500 chips for an ounce of guac. And I just don't eat avocados. And that was just because I didn't know how to eat them.

Did you know that they taste good with eggs? I didn't. Good for you if you did. I stumbled upon a recipe where you crack an egg into the avocado and bake it. I tried that. It failed miserably. I won't even entertain you with pictures of the horrid attempt. So I scratched that and tried something else (because for some reason I was gung ho on eating an avocado.)

I scrambled the eggs and avocado together and it turned out PERFFFFFect.

This recipe is great for doing things on the run. Mix it, pop it in, go do something else, come back to it, and eat it.

 Avocado Egg Basket 

Ingredients (for 2 people)

• 1 ripe avocado, halved, pitted
• 2 large eggs
• 1 tbsp goat*, almond, or coconut milk
• Sea salt
• Parsley

Instructions 

• Preheat the oven to 425 degrees
• Scrape out the avocado meat (do we call it meat?) into a bowl. You don't have to fully scrape it out. I find that leaving a thin layer makes the dish very good.
• Mix in the eggs, milk, salt, and parsley (and whatever spices/meats you like!)
• Make sure the mixture is not too chunky (I usually use an electric blender)
• Then pour the mixture back into the avocado shell. You will notice that you have leftover... At this point, I usually transfer it to a tiny oven safe dish or a cupcake tinfoil (great way to make portable egg muffins!)
• I put the avocado in a bread loaf pan because it allows the avocado to stand up well without falling over. And then you can place the tinfoil in there too!
• Then I let it bake for 15-20 minutes.
• After removing it, I topped mine with shredded ham and shredded goat* cheese.
• Enjoy ;).

I'll usually take a shower in those 15-20 minutes and then come down and eat my breakfast. Yum. I say 2 people because 1 avocado basket and then part of the egg muffin with a glass of coconut milk and a side of fruits usually does the trick for me. Other times I just eat both baskets and give the extra eggs to my brother who eats it with his gluten-free bread and milk. It's up to you and your appetite!

I wonder what else I can bake my eggs in...

*Goat milk isn't paleo but it is primal and I use raw, organic, grass-fed goat milk. It has a strong taste but it complements eggs so wonderfully in my opinion! My brother drinks it regularly, but I'll only use it in my eggs. I found unflavored almond or coconut milk works well to give the eggs a good milky flavor :).